The Long Goodbye

The last few days have been a mere formality - waiting for my plane to arrive. Nathan was able to change his flight so that he would go home a day before me and so last night was our final night together here in Africa. It was a lucky break for Nathan because he feels (and looks) terribly sick. But that didn't stop him from going out for a final drink or two at the nearest pub.

It was our final salute to this continent and a surprisingly good time. We planned on having just one but one turned into four or five. Who's really counting? Nathan's Bowels (get it?) held up well enough for him to brave a few beers and we smoked a cigar, something we had been planning to do for the last 10 weeks. It was a nice moment that was a fitting farewell to a very good trip to Africa. Nathan and I reminisced over cheep beer while listening to Tupac's California Luv get mixed with Backstreet Boys in what was probably the worst DJ'ing performance I have ever witnessed. Pair that with the big screen TV's showing 12 year old womens Karate compeition and... well... welcome to Africa. I really don't get the entertainment industry out here. I really think that there is a market here waiting to get exploited by some creative minds. Topsy, if you are reading this, get started.

While Nathan grabbed his bags I hailed him a cab and soon enough he was off. Our journey together was over.

I had a bit of energy so I decided to go out for a bit and just relax with my thoughts. I found a club that was playing some good American Rock N Roll and posted up for about 45 minutes.

SHORT RANT: It is an "African-American" thing to like Hip Hop. In Africa, the most common music is reggae, followed closely by Pop, Rock, and even a bit of country... seriously. Last night at the club the locals were going absolutely crazy for Linkin Park, Chili Peppers, and other Rock bands. I mean, jumping up and down, as if they were at a concert.

I mysteriously got very tired and decided to just go home and fall asleep. While walking home, I finished the cigar that Nathan and I had split and wouldn't you know it, smoking in public is a crime. Eager to tell me this were 3 "police" who quickly cornered me. It was like I was in my little bubble in my mind, walking not noticing anything, then suddenly I am cornered against a wall.

"Did you know smoking in Public is illegal in Nairobi? Come with us, you are going to jail."

I have been in Africa for too long to fall for this charade. All these jokers wanted was a small bribe which, given that I was 24 hours from my flight, I was happy to give. I knew that I had a 1000 bill a 500 bill and about 6 or 7 100 bills in my pocket. The odds were in my favor that if I just reached in my pocket, I would grab a 100 and this would all be over. So I reached in and tried to grab the 100. Of course, as luck would have it, I pulled the 1000. But I refused to give it to them. I was pulling a bit of a tough guy with them although I probably should have just run away. I tried a second time and of course, I pulled out the 500. What are the odds? I had all those 100's and of course I pull out the only big bills.

They smiled, laughed even, and took off with their 500. Back to serve and protect the streets of Nai-robbery. For the record, I was never robbed in Africa by anyone other than a police officer. This was the 3rd time that I was robbed by a cop. God bless Africa.

While at the bar I had this feeling and the correlating thought: I am 8,000 miles from everyone that I know. No one in this country, on this continent, in this hemisphere, knows my name or who I am. I am completely alone. It was a pretty interesting feeling, one that I am glad to have experienced, especially since it has only lasted for less than a day.

Today I tried to occupy my time by going to a library to read HEART OF DARKNESS but THE library in Nairobi was very old. I asked reception where I could find Joseph Conrad and she gave me a blank look. Then I asked for fiction books and she said, "oh, fiction is the 3 shelves over there." Really? The 3 shelves? 3 shelves of fiction?!? I ended up finding a few short stories by Kafka that only occupied me for about 2 hours. The rest of the day will be spent online and possibly watching... God forgive me... NEXT starring Nicolas Cage.

I am not sure whether I will write a reflective blog once I am back in the states, but there is one thing that I would like to mention. One little rant that will require you to stick with me.

While finding ways to waste time the last 4 days I have been re-reading my blogs from May and June. Especially with the early ones in Cape Town, I couldn't believe what I was reading. I was so ignorant to life here in Africa. In one blog I refer to Zulu dancers that sang in Afrikaans. It is sad because they were not Zulu's they were Xhosa's and they were singing in Xhosa. How little I knew about life here. My first few blogs were filled with misinformation and errors on my part. Harmless? Probably, but still a reflection of how little I knew. But to my credit, these things must be learned through experience. And the last 10 weeks have provided countless lessons on life in Africa, the people, and the problems.

But like most things in life, the more you learn, the more you realize that you know very little. And the more you look for answers the more questions seem to come to the surface. Each year millions upon millions of dollars are poured into Africa in aid and relief. NGO's occupy every corner of the countries that I have visited. People filled with the grandest intentions arrive willing to help a continent that is in need of a helping hand. Honorable people, often very courageous, hard working, selfless and inspired.

Now, I am too simple a mind to offer anything of significance. And I certainly don't wish to take anything away from the people that sacrifice their comforts for a far and fleeting goal. But one of the most troubling things that I take away from this experience is the seeming futility of such efforts that are so common here in Africa. Before I sound like a nihilist, what I mean is that I hoped to come to Africa and find some small answer, some small inspiration about how to help this continent. But the trek has only opened my eyes to all sorts of new questions.

It only serves to reaffirm my belief that I can only focus on the personal. I have met many people on this trip that will stay with me forever. Some, I hope, will remain in close contact for a long time to come. It is in these relationships that I find some sense of purpose. I am pretty confident that I can help many of my new friends with their personal ambitions, advise them about their current problems, and prepare them for their upcoming challenges. But I am also pretty certain that it can only be done on a personal level. Not from any religious dogma or political propoganda, but from the personal friendships that I have been able to establish.

And I am done. I still have about 6 hours before I need to find a taxi for the airport, and from there another 24 hours of "airtime" before I am home. But this is the conclusion of my 5,000 miles in Africa. Thank you to my readers. If you want to do a very cool thing, send me a comment on this blog letting me know that you have been following the posts. It would be neat to see who has actually kept up with them. I promise that when I arrive in the states, and Nathan sends me my copy of the photos, you will be treated to some amazing photos. Seriously, you will want to check back in about 2 weeks.

Shaking me (I need to get out of Africa soon!)

The last 2 days have been a lot like LORD OF THE RINGS. Boring, uneventful, and way too much walking around. (that one was for you Patrick)

We woke up and Nathan continued to struggle with whatever bug has been plaguing him. He thinks it is malnutrition but ironically, if there was a way to tell how much everyone in Kenya eats, me and Nathan are probably in the top 1 percent. But whatever it is, he really has been sick. With his sickness, the bathroom that looks like the movie SAW, and the HUNDREDS of cockroaches that we have found in our room, our quarter is probably the least sanitary place that I have ever been. And we have been here for 4 days. No exaggeration needed, you cannot step foot on our floor without squashing a cockroach. Fortunately, they are little cockraoches, but it is truly disgusting.

Among the many lowlights of the day, we saw DIE HARD 4.0 and surprisingly liked it. My standards are getting lower, yikes. It was good fun, except the movie theatre had a sound problem and every 5 minutes we would get a loud buzzing noise. It was really distracting but the locals didn't seem to mind. Nor did they seem to get the movie, Nathan and I were often the only ones laughing.

We tried to find a pool hall but there apparently aren't many in town. The only one we found near us, mysteriously, refused us service, even though the pool tables were not in use.

Can we use the pool table?

No, they are broken.

No they aren't, I can see the balls, the table and the queue.

No, they are broken, go somewhere else.

Strange. Do they really not want our money? People out here seem to really have a poor business sense. I am always thinking, wow, these people have no idea how to sell, how to accomodate, or how to run a business. Somehow, everyone learned the, "hello my friend, I give you good price," tactic but can't figure out how to maximize on the simplist opportunities.

Top 3 inneficiencies of Africa:

NUMBER 3: Nathan was sick when we went out to eat. He couldn't stomache anything heavy so he just had juice and a dessert. I ordered pasta. Although the place was empty, we were almost kicked out because you must order a full meal. Although Nathan spent about 5 dollars and I spent about 7, because he only ordered juice and dessert he was almost kicked out. Did they not want our money? NUMBER 2: Instead of traffic lights, busy intersections use the roundabout. It is basically a free-for-all to get inside the roundabout, cars literally jumping curbs to jockey for position, it is a nightmare inside the roundabout, cars in the middle lane will cut through 3 lanes unannounced to exit, and most of these cars are carrying 20 + passengers.

Number 1: The Bus Terminal in Harare: I could have said EVERYTHING ABOUT ZIMBABWE but the terminal stands out. You must go to the Zimbabwe post to catch the full drift but basically, instead of filing in one at a time, everyone pushed and shoved for 20 minutes trying to get on the bus, even though there were seats for everyone, and even though we would be sitting on that bus for the next 18 hours. It was a circus of idiots, human primal instincts taking over. What should have taken 3 minutes took 30 minutes. What shood have been painless, turned into a WWE smackdown pay-per-view caliber dogpile.

As you might have read, there was an earthquake here in Kenya yesterday and it was the first time that I have ever felt one. In Nairobi, it was only the aftershocks of a 6.1 that happened in the south but it was enough to rattle the shop I was in on the 3rd floor. People paniced and rushed to the street. It was kind of cool. Okay... the highlight of my day was feeling an earthquake. I really need to get out of Africa.

In clposing, please send me a request if there is anything that you might want from Africa before I return. Yours truly, Adam Mares.

Fragments

Today was a day that seemed to happen in spurts and stops. To paraphrase, I didn't do much. But any day in Africa provides a few mini stories. So here are a few.

I tried to sleep in because I was exhausted the night before, physically and mentally, but woke up at 7.

I saw a dead guy on the sidewalk. He was old and had apparently passed while walking home with groceries in hand. There were no cops or anything, people literally walked around him as he lay face up on the sidewalk, clearly dead.

A car passed by the street that only had 3 wheels and a frame.

A guy tried to sell me a flashlight, following me around for a block trying to persuade me that I would get a good price. I told him that I didn't want or need a flashlight but that didn't stop him from trying to persuade me. Once a guy tried as hard to sell me passport photos, regardless of the fact that it would do me no good.

I have yet to find a toilette with a lid. You have to sort of hover over the toilette. It is tricky.

3 people have convinced me that they can transfer my photos onto an ipod, each failing, and then charging me for their labor.

I paid 13 dollars for dry noodles with ramen sauce on top.

Bill Simmons is still my favorite sports columnist. I've read ten of his blogs today.

"Fools Rush In" is playing at the theatre along with "Punch Drunk Love." Matthew Perry still has a career but it is Africa.

I got hit by a car. Only the window hit me, the side window, but the guy didn't stop.

A woman tried to sell me her necklace for 30 dollars. Eventually she would lower the price, without me even asking, to 2 dollars. I declined.

I've always wondered what it would be like to be the high roller at a Vegas casino. I walked into a casino here in Nairobi and got a glimpse of what it would feel like. Everyone's MZUNGU radar went off and I was watched very carefully. Even followed to the toilette. Roulette tables have a minimum bet of about 40 cents. Look for a future blog about how I got stuck in Africa after a ridiculous series of unfortunate events, going broke 40 cents at a time.

The bathroom in our hostel looks exactly like the setting of the first SAW film. Only a bit scarier.

I've seen 5 cockroaches in our room so far.

Nathan got bit by a spider and started freaking about it being poisonous. I teased him until I saw the spider. It looked big enough to swallow a small dog. Africa has scary snakes, scorpions and spiders.

The newspaper front page was about how police shot and killed 23 suspected gang members in a small home. It was credited as a BIG SUCCESS.

I've spent 10 dollars at the internet cafe today. That is nearly 10 hours worth of internet. And I haven't hardly done anything while connected.

Nathan is sick and hopefully will feel better tomorrow. Otherwise, we will go get him checked out by a doctor. Today has been a bit of a waste. Sorry I dont at least have photos to share.